How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
