Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
