Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize