Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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