Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Semen is not good for contacts.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
