wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
high people should be assigned attendants
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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