I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
