508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
