I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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