Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Sex in the backyard? Check.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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