This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
it's great music for shaving your balls
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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