No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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