ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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