hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
