You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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