Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
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