Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
