i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
