should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
