You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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