This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
How does one acquire holy water?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize