Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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