called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I'm both gender and math confused
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
