Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
