i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
FUCK WHALES
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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