I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
