Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
In other news, I just burned my penis
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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