I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
