I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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