just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
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