Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
