singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
