somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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