trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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