Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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