awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
