Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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