Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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