No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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