I wish i was in the wii world.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
