Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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