I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
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Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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