I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
