Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
