he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
