I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
