one might say we're banned from that church
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I think I have vodka in my lungs
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
i think im in europe. pls send help
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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