are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Floor bacon is actually really good
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize