ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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