I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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