11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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